NewA friend of mine is, in a matter of weeks, participating
in the upcoming White Collar Boxing Fight Night at the
Habtoor Grand. The premise of this highly anticipated
event is to take a bunch of corporate bods who've probably
never thrown a punch in their lives, and train them
up with professional boxers and sportsmen until they're
rock solid, foaming at the mouths and ready to let rip
like Mike Tyson - only without the ear-biting incidents,
we hope.
My friend is, quite understandably, terrified. He's
also very, very strong now. Six weeks in and I wouldn't
cross him in a dark alleyway, or any other part of Satwa
for that matter. It's all very noble though - my friend
and his equally tortured teammates are all taking part
for charity.
He told me last weekend that he'd been given a bag of
protein shakes and tablets to consume instead of meals,
in the weeks left until the fight. I'm sure this makes
sense - but how drinking girly flavoured milkshakes
instead of iron-laden steaks and lashings and lashings
of mashed potato prior to a punch up can be beneficial,
is beyond me. But then, my idea of bulking up is putting
on a cardy before sitting on my butt in the cinema for
two hours.
The team went to get their photos taken a few days ago,
in 'a home of royalty' no less. Apparently, on walking
into the house to meet the photographer, they were approached
by a beautiful, strong looking white Labrador. It took
a few moments to realize that the creature bounding
towards them was actually a lion. Yup. A lion. There
were three of them, so I'm told. This is how fighters
spend their days in the Middle East you know - mingling
with jungle beasts and drinking milkshakes.
On the night, we all get to go and eat three courses
of five-star food and guzzle all the wine we can handle,
while our heroes get smacked about the heads by the
opposition. Sounds fabulous doesn't it! Can you imagine
cheering on your pal as you wave a roasted chicken about
on a fork, accidentally dropping a wing in the cleavage
of your tablemate, who might be dressed in her poshest
frock but doesn't even notice because she's too busy
dodging the blood splatters heading towards her from
the ring? It's inevitable, I'm afraid.
The fighters even get to choose their boxing names.
I won't disclose my friend's, although it's sure to
cause a 'stir'.
Each are fighting someone of equal size and weight,
to make it fair. I'm told that at the last event, the
ring was cleaned (of blood?) after the matches and everyone
climbed in to dance the rest of the night away. Personally,
I'm looking forward to this more than I've looked forward
to anything in a long time. I do wish they'd include
the lions a bit more though. It would probably make
world headlines if an impromptu fight with a wild cat
was included in the price.
Knowing Dubai though, it wouldn't surprise me if they
added one at the last minute.
Posted: 22 May 2008
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